So, as I have often done before....finding some of the best posts from others about faith, family, or parenting, here's a new link to a new blog of Christian mothers with small children.
This one woke me up this morning, considering that my children are both 2 1/2, and frequently use the word "no", whine, tattle, scream, and overall make me laugh and cry within about 5 seconds of each other.
Grace and Parenting.
Blessings.
Friday, April 27, 2012
Thursday, April 19, 2012
Not ready yet
I can't do it. I can't delete the blog. Just as I feel that way, I get a comment or email from someone who is going through this and is finding peace in the midst of their own storm.
For those of you going through the sometimes turbulent, sometimes TOO PEACEFUL (like when you are in between fingerprinting and I600 clearance) times of international adoption, you need someone who has walked the road to say this to you:
IT GETS BETTER.
and this....
IT'S WORTH IT!
And the other reason I can't delete it just yet is that I want to be able to save all my posts about our trips and compile them into something I can give the girls. And I haven't had time to do that. So maybe if I can find the time over the summer to get that and all our travel pics and videos together - maybe even posting a "gotcha day" video - maybe THEN I will delete the blog. Until then, it can sit in silence while I stalk Jon Acuff and Jen Hatmaker and wish I was cool like them.
Because, as you already know, I'm not cool. But I wish I were.
----Speaking of Jen Hatmaker----
I have found myself on the verge of something big that moved her family to South Austin to plant a church in the middle of a struggling demographic, a move spurred on by the Holy Spirit and a holy dissatisfaction with the way their family and their "sexy church" did (or didn't do, rather) social justice. Her prayer? "God, raise in me a singular holy passion."
Dangerous words.
And I'm almost there.
For those of you going through the sometimes turbulent, sometimes TOO PEACEFUL (like when you are in between fingerprinting and I600 clearance) times of international adoption, you need someone who has walked the road to say this to you:
IT GETS BETTER.
and this....
IT'S WORTH IT!
And the other reason I can't delete it just yet is that I want to be able to save all my posts about our trips and compile them into something I can give the girls. And I haven't had time to do that. So maybe if I can find the time over the summer to get that and all our travel pics and videos together - maybe even posting a "gotcha day" video - maybe THEN I will delete the blog. Until then, it can sit in silence while I stalk Jon Acuff and Jen Hatmaker and wish I was cool like them.
Because, as you already know, I'm not cool. But I wish I were.
----Speaking of Jen Hatmaker----
I have found myself on the verge of something big that moved her family to South Austin to plant a church in the middle of a struggling demographic, a move spurred on by the Holy Spirit and a holy dissatisfaction with the way their family and their "sexy church" did (or didn't do, rather) social justice. Her prayer? "God, raise in me a singular holy passion."
Dangerous words.
And I'm almost there.
Thursday, April 12, 2012
Ewww. Just....Ewww.
I'm considering a jump back to the stone ages - before facebook. Before blogging. Before complete strangers could peek in on my life.
Nothing has happened personally, and I'm sure that this isn't rare, but when I manage my blog and look at referring sites that got people to my page...Well, they're not things I want to be connected with.
It scares me a little.
I'm going to pray about this over the weekend and decide on Sunday whether to pull the plug or not. My call as a Christian is to live in the world and not be of it. And it is just too easy for the world to try to put its thumbprint on these pages I can't control 100%. So this may be it, folks. I've threatened it before over safety, privacy, etc. But now it really comes down to two things: my witness, and my comfort level.
Signing off for now.
Nothing has happened personally, and I'm sure that this isn't rare, but when I manage my blog and look at referring sites that got people to my page...Well, they're not things I want to be connected with.
It scares me a little.
I'm going to pray about this over the weekend and decide on Sunday whether to pull the plug or not. My call as a Christian is to live in the world and not be of it. And it is just too easy for the world to try to put its thumbprint on these pages I can't control 100%. So this may be it, folks. I've threatened it before over safety, privacy, etc. But now it really comes down to two things: my witness, and my comfort level.
Signing off for now.
Tuesday, April 10, 2012
Excuse me...
I'm having a moment.
Kind of a pity party, but maybe not. Maybe it's just a stirring of something different. A realization of sorts.
An awakening.
I've been doing some reading, some listening, and have come to the realization that I'm not cool.
Last week I was joking around with some of the kids at church, and we were taking turns playing the drums. We really need a new drummer for our worship team, and I let the youth get on there and play around, hoping one of them will "catch" drumming like a person catches a stomach virus. Sudden and intense!
I pulled Pandora up on my phone and started my worship station, then I sat down to see if I could play along with anything.
Well, I apparently have a stellar immune system, because I didn't catch anything. Some of the kids smiled as if to say, "Awww, poor old lady trying to play the drums." My comment was - "You know, I saw this going down a L O T differently in my mind."
And that pretty much sums up my life.
I saw it turning out a lot differently. Don't get me wrong. I'm content with my life as it is.
I'm just not cool.
I want to be creative. I want to be more outgoing. I want to walk around barefoot, shlepping my keys and stuff because I gave all my shoes and purses away to homeless people.
I read "Interrupted" by Jen Hatmaker over the last couple of weeks. She's really been messing me up lately. I envied some of the big things that God called her and her family to do, although going through them were initially very difficult. And btw, calling envy is like my #1 sin. I always want to be doing what someone else is doing. I'm like that girl in the youth group who came to a work day recently and started five projects and didn't finish any of them because as soon as someone started doing something "cool" which in kid speak means - DESTRUCTIVE - she wanted in on that too, until it got hard.
But in Jen's book, she made the point that you have to start where you are. And that's true. Kind of like me and working out. I recently bought an elliptical machine. Know how I earned the right to ask the hubs if I could drop that kind of coin on exercise equipment? I ran two miles. I started with what I had and worked up to the point that he knew I was serious. And I dropped 19 pounds - now 24.
I started with what I had.
I haven't always been faithful with what I've been given. I look back over my career as a worship leader - both volunteer and church staff, and there were always things I could have done better. The main one being my own personal worship to fuel what happened with the church or church group. It's a daily training leading up to the Sunday 5K.
Lord, I still want to be cool. I want the music I write to ring with glockenspiels and sitars and tubas and stuff. I want interesting turns in the lyrics that speak of C.S. Lewis and the Hunger Games or whatever the kids are into these days. But that just plays into my need to be liked and secure.
Instead, Lord, maybe I need to be consistent. Maybe consistency points count more than cool points in your economy. Because fashions change. Musical tastes change. But you don't.
Kind of a pity party, but maybe not. Maybe it's just a stirring of something different. A realization of sorts.
An awakening.
I've been doing some reading, some listening, and have come to the realization that I'm not cool.
Last week I was joking around with some of the kids at church, and we were taking turns playing the drums. We really need a new drummer for our worship team, and I let the youth get on there and play around, hoping one of them will "catch" drumming like a person catches a stomach virus. Sudden and intense!
I pulled Pandora up on my phone and started my worship station, then I sat down to see if I could play along with anything.
Well, I apparently have a stellar immune system, because I didn't catch anything. Some of the kids smiled as if to say, "Awww, poor old lady trying to play the drums." My comment was - "You know, I saw this going down a L O T differently in my mind."
And that pretty much sums up my life.
I saw it turning out a lot differently. Don't get me wrong. I'm content with my life as it is.
I'm just not cool.
I want to be creative. I want to be more outgoing. I want to walk around barefoot, shlepping my keys and stuff because I gave all my shoes and purses away to homeless people.
I read "Interrupted" by Jen Hatmaker over the last couple of weeks. She's really been messing me up lately. I envied some of the big things that God called her and her family to do, although going through them were initially very difficult. And btw, calling envy is like my #1 sin. I always want to be doing what someone else is doing. I'm like that girl in the youth group who came to a work day recently and started five projects and didn't finish any of them because as soon as someone started doing something "cool" which in kid speak means - DESTRUCTIVE - she wanted in on that too, until it got hard.
But in Jen's book, she made the point that you have to start where you are. And that's true. Kind of like me and working out. I recently bought an elliptical machine. Know how I earned the right to ask the hubs if I could drop that kind of coin on exercise equipment? I ran two miles. I started with what I had and worked up to the point that he knew I was serious. And I dropped 19 pounds - now 24.
I started with what I had.
I haven't always been faithful with what I've been given. I look back over my career as a worship leader - both volunteer and church staff, and there were always things I could have done better. The main one being my own personal worship to fuel what happened with the church or church group. It's a daily training leading up to the Sunday 5K.
Lord, I still want to be cool. I want the music I write to ring with glockenspiels and sitars and tubas and stuff. I want interesting turns in the lyrics that speak of C.S. Lewis and the Hunger Games or whatever the kids are into these days. But that just plays into my need to be liked and secure.
Instead, Lord, maybe I need to be consistent. Maybe consistency points count more than cool points in your economy. Because fashions change. Musical tastes change. But you don't.
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